The Journey to the Light after an Abusive Relationship by Richard Skerritt

Where is the Light when you’re in an abusive relationship? 

Life with an abusive partner can be a dark place. We become isolated from friends and family; battered by a continuous stream of verbal abuse (and sometimes worse), and most of all we suffer enormous pressure to agree to and support our partners reality – a reality in which they have no flaws, and we are the cause of all problems.

Although at some level we know this is wrong, and we know that we are not at fault, the isolation, pressure and demands can make us think that we are, indeed, crazy. And in this situation it is really difficult to think in a balanced way about what is happening and what we should be doing. All the forces around us push us to remain, and remain compliant. This is the nature of abuse.

You’re not Crazy

Tears and Healing can open the door of this isolated place and begin to let the light shine in. It was written in the midst of a powerful (and growing) abusive situation. It looks at the experience from within, and so it offers a unique and powerful view on the situation.

Abusive marriages put us in a powerful double-bind. Our responsibilities and sense of obligation are often powerful. At the same time, our own – and our childrens’ – need for safety, and our exhaustion from continuous abuse are strong motivators to change. Sorting this out isn’t easy, even if our friends or family glibly say, “Just get out.” It isn’t so simple.

Tears and Healing looks at the many aspects of an abusive situation. It challenges with questions; challenges preconceptions, and explains what is happening psychologically. It’s written for real people in real painful situations; it’s not a book by clinicians about some disorder they see in their clinics.

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